Do you remember who I am? Because I don't. I get as close as I can to touch anything, but there will always be particles between me and myself, between you and me, between eye and eyelid. I like the feel of the molecules between my finger tips and the keys of my netbook. Weird to say or rather, to type.
I miss a lot. I know that I'm going to cry sixty-percent of the time while I'm in Texas. I'm am definitely going to cry when I get seen off by one of the most amazing people in the world.</3
I'm in a disappearing mood. I want to leave everything. I want to start new. I want to sever all ties. I want to go to you and look straight in your face for a few seconds before looking at my feet and muttering "goodbye". The tears will hit the toes of my shoes and I'll look up at you one more time before walking away at a fast pace. There are very few things I want to take with me: Pawlie, Sophia (my vihuela), a small suitcase of clothes, and a large jacket. My hair is bleached blonde with some brown streaks from the roots, I'm wearing a denim button-up, large sunglasses, a sun hat with a sunflower on the right side, my sexy jeans (ha), brand new boots, and a matching waist belt. In my left hand I am carrying a business-like suitcase with my jacket folded over it and my right hand is holding Sophia. On my back is my little backpack with Pawlie, a few important documents, money, and such inside. I want to disappear....
Yet, I don't know myself.
14 comments:
If you don't know yourself then you will never be happy. Maybe this disappearing will help you discover yourself, and in time, become happy. Or it may not. Either way, do what your heart tells you without the influence of others. Because if you let others influence this, you will never be truly happy with your choice. Of course the disappearing act probably won't be as dramatic and in front of the most amazing person in the world(whoever that is). Just do what is best for you and not what is best for everyone else around you
I know who I am sometimes. Ha, that sounds funny. But no, it's no one special. I would go to everyone I could, straight to their doors and say my goodbyes without more than two glances before I left. I don't know if I want to disappear, it's sort of a conditional thing. It happens sometimes and then it'll go away. I think it's just a matter of needing closure on somethings, even though disappearing would do the exact opposite. Do you get what I'm saying?
Btw, you took the magic out of the math.
Yes, I do get what you are saying. But what would you do if someone wasn't home. Just leave them a note. And the conditional thing makes sense. As humans we all seek closure to things we want to know.
Also, Math has no magic. Its all logic.
I've thought about that many times. I've thought of withdrawing all the money from my account, purchasing a plane ticket to god knows where, and just leaving everything behind. I just never do it.
It's a term my Math Analysis teacher uses. He'll show us a 'trick' to make the work easier, then he'll "take the magic out of the math" by showing us the logic behind the trick. So what I meant by that it that it's kinda lame that I know who you are, lol. You shouldn't have told me it was you because it's easier to talk to strangers. Strangers don't have expectations; and now that I know who you are, I might not reveal as much as I would if I keep thinking you were some random person.
Well im glad you have'nt done it yet.
Also, I cant believe you didnt know it was me. All I did was change the way i would word a sentance. But who always gave you things like that?
Also, the fact that the only way i could talk to you was to use a pen name, as if i were a stranger, is odd.
I am also up to listening to you. Always.
Why? And yet? That's what this upcoming summer is for. It's my drive away from everything, you know?
I really didn't know, lol. I was excited that some random person was talking to me. xD Way to kill my imagination.(x
Yeah that is pretty odd, but if you would have put (I almost typed 'putten' lol) the name that I gave you in the side bar; I would have responded. Just probably not the same way. We all have set ways we talk to certain people, even if we don't realize it.
No offense but I like talking to you on this rather than texting. I don't do as many typos here as I do with my phone. And texting is dead to me, I'm such a lame text-er that all conversations get so annoying to me, especially in this weather. Plus I hate touch screens, lol. iPhones get so damn nasty.
On a side note,
I'm using safari and I find it funny that AT&T, iPod, iPhone, etc do not have the red underline that means you need to correct it, but Verizon and Nextel etc do.
Well it is eiser to talk to you on this. I can also see this anytime even if im not home. And i know of your summer plans. I also plan to disapppear but in a subtle way
also, we need to do a walk in the park again
Yes we do. Just tell me when. I'm always up for a stroll through the park.
This weekend....of course!
What day?
Damn, not Saturday. I'm driving up to the outlets in Williamsburg.
Sunday is better for me too :) Have soccer practice saturday.
Okay, que bueno.(:
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