There have been a lot of thoughts swimming through my head as of late, but the most interesting have been about myself. (Probably because I am myself, ha ha.) But these things interest me because I'm starting to question the motives behind some of the actions I choose. Don't get me wrong, I don't regret a single action I choose because I am happy for who I am today and I hope that I can say the same tomorrow. Please allow me to clarify.
Lately, I have become much more aware of my indifference towards most things. When it comes down to making a decision about something, either option is just as appealing to me because I really couldn't care either way. When I reflect on the decision later, I ponder what drove me to choose said option. I don't wonder what life would have been like if I chose the other because, with my indifference, not much would have been different. I ask "Did I choose this because of how I felt at the moment?" "Was this chosen as a result of habit?" And other such questions.
At the end of the day, my goal is to reach the core of my decision making, to figure out what is driving me to do what I do, and the cause of my indifference. And until I can get to the roots of my pondering, all I can do in continue to interrogate myself.
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