Vacation

So as you may or may not know, I am going to visit Texas for the winter break. I probably won't blog until I return from there and I'll most likely have a really long photo blog. Enjoy whatever holiday you celebrate or don't celebrate! :D

Eventful

     Yesterday was a day of thought for me. My father, Heather, Kateli, and myself ate at Buffalo Wild Wings followed by a trip to an ice skating rink. (Oddly enough, none of us ordered wings at BWW, lol.) But the ice skating is what's most important about yesterday.

     At first my father and I stuck together but as I got better on the ice, I surpassed him and thought a lot to myself. I observed the people from very young to about mid-adult, roam the ice, stay close to the side, or sit in the break areas. And though the ages of the people were not consistent, the majority of ice skaters were couples.

     They held hands as they skated, they helped the other up if they fell, they kissed until they both fell, they glided across the ice so easily as a duo. My heart sank; I have never felt so alone, so isolated. I was surrounded by a sea of people and yet, I was the only one there. I was the only me. 

     It made me think of movies, of how everything always works out so perfectly for the main character. But what about the supporting characters? What happens to them? All this questioning lead to a train of thoughts about what we expect from the world because of some movies. Even my thoughts were cliché and they are as follows:

"All I want to do is fall. I'm gliding so steadily on the ice and only a few thoughts run through my head. 1. Fall. Just fall so someone can save you. 2. These ice skates are painful. 3. Don't fall, you'll get killed. 4. My left hurt is hurting more than the right. 5. Let someone run into to you to see what happens. But of course the things that are not naturally allowed are avoided. We all want things to happen but we won't make them happen ourselves. We carry on with our actions, repeating what we want to ourselves, hoping that wanting it more will make it happen. And usually, it doesn't."

     Guess what ended up happening? I accidently slipped over this cute guy's skate laces! I narrowly escaped death though; he ended up catching me before I face planted on the ice. It was just like the movies and it's strange how I thought none of this would ever happen! We started talking and... Nothing. I went home and fell asleep, like every other day.
     I dreamt of scuba diving with my son. We were on this fancy boat and then we were in the water, I don't recall the details. Later on we were back on the boat and Joey and my son were talking, I could see them from the room I was in. My son asked Joey a question which was inaudible to me; Joey replied, "Don't worry man. I got a plan for her." I was enraged. I jumped off the boat and swam into the nothingness until I woke up.
     I drove a great distance today and did quite well. My father scared me when he and Lee were talking about IHOP; all of a sudden he points across my line of sight, while I'm driving, and yells "IHOP!!!" It was a good thing I was at a stop sign because it scared the half the life out of me, though not literally. I spent most of the day with Lee, roaming around McArthur Mall and buying Christmas presents. (Lee is much taller than I!) I got a beanie for Big L and some lotions for my mother. I purchased a photo from my photo shoot (and will by a frame tomorrow) for my grandparents. I got some stocking stuffers for Kasey and a skirt for myself. I purchased this cool thingy... it's amazing! I'll post a photo of it after Christmas. Mmmm, oh and I bought a wallet for Cupcake! I'm nearly broke now, but it's in the spirit of the holidays!<3 I'm having four Christmases, but that's another story.(:
     After returning to my house I wrapped some gifts, Kasey came over, Charmander came over, and then Lee's padre picked us up to go to her house. The thing with Charmander was fun though! We were throwing bags of dried fruit at each other! It hurt quite terribly but It was very fun. Though that's not what I want to talk about, I want to tell you about what happened at Lee's.
     Kasey and I got picked up and ended up at Lee's. I was evaluating her room because she wants me to help her arrange/design it. (Fun for me and good more my future major: interior design.) Then Lee spoke of her self-confidence issues. Kasey and I decided to play "What Not To Wear" and we would be the judges. It was pretty fun and I know Kasey wanted to steal a few of Lee's clothes, lol.
     We played QWOP, which is actually really funny. Lee got to 1.6 meters by herself, myself to -1.4 meters, and Kasey made it all the way to 4.7 meters alone! It was fantastic. When Kasey and I teamed up we got to 14.9 meters I believe. We have that on video but we ended up with around 13 meters because we started going backwards...
     Moving on, Lee happened to have a random giant crayon in her room! It was quite fabulous. Kasey wondered what it would be like if all our writing utensils were that big? Gosh, I couldn't fathom it! But before all the fun stuff, Kasey wasn't feeling "Kasey" which was a real bummer. It was hard to get her to smile but we managed to have a great time anyway. I am truly sorry for bumping her head on the chair leg... but other than that I'm sure she had a great time. Especially after I found those photographs of her beloved companion Mr.K-bauer in Lee's digital moment-capturing device. (Ha ha, digital camera sounds too boring.) We ate a ton of blueberry waffles at Lee's, ha ha ha we're obese people.
     Mhmm, when Lee's padres dropped us off at home, we stayed at my house for a while, had some mac and cheese, then looked at Lee's tumblr.
     I guess tumblr is nice, but I prefer blogger. It just feels so much more sophisticated to me, you know? I mean, it really isn't. Everyone is free to express their thoughts and ideas however they want, but I guess it just takes a lot more to do it here. You can't just "reblog" any random photo you happen to like. It just takes more to be a blogger user, in my opinion... I digress. I went way off topic there, ha!
     It's time to call it a night or rather, a morning. It's taken me a very long while to type up this post. Goodnight blogger world.
     Oh and I forgot to mention, me and SDB are chillin tomorrow. That's the first time I've mentioned him, ha ha.(:

This is what my hair would look like if I parted it the other way. 

Oh, and I like wearing other people's clothes.

(:

Conversations

Some are fact, some are fiction. Some are theoretical, some are proven. Some are exact, some are elaborated. But they are all from little scenarios I play in my head, regardless if they happened or not.


One:
"I love every inch of you!"
 "What!? You don't love every centimeter of me!?"


Two:
"You're big headed because you think you're better than everyone else"
"I'm not big headed... I have no right to tell you what to do. I know I'm not above everyone else."
"You have more leeway than anyone else."
"But I'm not better than anyone so why should I have more leeway?"
"Because you matter more. And I'm supposed to be the most important to you, not some idiot."
Thinks to self, "If I matter more, then you are saying I'm better than everyone else. But I'm not so if I matter more, my opinion or what have you should be equal to someone else who cares. Who's being big headed now? 'I'm supposed to be the most important...' You're being a hypocrite." But says, "He's not an idiot. He's my friend."
"That's not fair. I want to see you first."
"This is the only day we're going to be in town at the same time..."
"I'm supposed to be the most important. You're making me feel like you don't even wanna see me."
Sigh. "I want to see you but I'm not missing the opportunity to see my friend. I'm sorry that you don't understand."

Three:
"...Ugly little girl."
"Was that supposed to be funny...?"
"It was a joke. Ha..."
Short chuckle. "It was kinda mean..."
"I was just joking. You know you're pretty."
"It doesn't matter whether I'm pretty or not."
"Yes it does!"
"Why?"
"Because you are pretty!"
"But even if I wasn't..."
"No, no. You're pretty. That's it."


Four:
"You're busy."
"No, I'm not busy."
"You're busy."
"I'm not, I really am not. Ha ha."
"I'm sleepy."
"Go to sleep then."
"Hmhmhmh, okaaaaaaayyyyy."
"Goodnight."
"Night, mhmhmmhhhmm."

My very own winter wonderland

I wanted to write about today because it was quite amazing, but I don't feel as up to it as I did before. But I won't leave you empty handed, my fellow bloggers. Enjoy!<3(:

 Kasey wrote "I <3 U" in the snow that was gathering in the street.

I took this photograph from my upstairs window.

Again, taken from my room's window.

Kasey wanted me to take some photos of her from my vantage point.

This is one of the better ones.

(:

Kasey went inside her house so I wrote her a little note.

She added the "more"

My house is the one with the gold car. 

;D

I loved the look of the barren, desolate street.

I call it "The path less traveled".

Cute close up of Kasey with her house to the left.

Photograph taken of me whilst at Pablo's house.

Credit to Miss Kasey

Thank you doll;<3

Creeper shots taken by Kasey.

We were inside my house when B and K built a snowman.

They placed it perfectly so that you can see it from my window.

(:

Taken by Kasey, yet again.

Just another photo of them building.

But later in the day some kid was trying to destroy the final project.

I yelled at him and he ran home.

:D

Perfect way to end the day and this post.

<3

Blog addiction

It saddens me when my favorite blogs don't update as much as they used to.

*Sigh*

Why can't they be this calm all the time? It's cute.<3

I want, I want, I want!







This isn't a usual blog for me.

Butttttt, I found these two extremely lovely dresses at this web address below. They're cute, aren't they? And vintage looking. Gotta love that. :D They would look just perfect with those shoes....
http://www.dearcreatures.com/index2.html 

These shoes were on the Seed Store blog. I don't know what brand they are./: But I'm dying to get the blue ones! Maybe the pink ones? Nahhh. But I'll take the red ones. xD I'll put the link up later if I find the brand.(: Okay, so I found that the brand is called Swedish Hasbeens and they are quite expensive for shoes...well I've actually seen worse prices... I think these would be worth it! :D Oh and here's credit where it's due: http://www.swedishhasbeens.com/

P.S. The blue ones are sexy as a mug! (My mother uses that phrase: "as a mug")

Oh man, I almost paid three times as much for these at hottopic.com! I'm glad I found them cheaper: http://www.bodyjewelrysource.com/ I'm hoping to size up to a 00 and get these amongst others, so I have a variety! I hope I can find more that I liked from hot topic here, like the Panda ones for Charmander, and these for Kasey and myself: Whales, white with glow-in-the-dark lightnining blots, penguins, octupi with mustaches, cute octupi , dinosaurs, glow-in-the-dark tapers, metallic hot pink zebra, cute owls, koi, and many many more cute plugs!(: Oh not to mention that I want my belly button pierced, (already got the piercing) a monroe, and maybe a lip ring (or stud) adjacent to the side with the monroe. And tattoos, don't forget them puppies. Ha ha ha! 

What's a girl without a fancy camera? I'll tell you, not me! :D Just kidding. I just really want a good quality camera for everything. I'm not too into photography but I'm starting to get into it. I'm always playing with Kasey's camera so I figure, why not get my own and stop mooching?(: This particular camera is a Canon EOS Rebel XS Digital Camera with 18-55 mm Lens. Sounds snazzy, don't it? ;D I hope one day soon that this pretty little puppy is in the palms of my hands! One day, if not for a holiday or anniversary of my birth, I will save up enough money somehow. With considerations to college and all that. And of course I have to credit whence the photo came: http://www.pcrichard.com/catalog/product.jsp?modelNo=REBELXS1855K&CID=AFC_Pricegrabber&gdftrk=gdfV2677_a_7c796_a_7c3134_a_7cREBELXS1855K

I want the most beautiful flowers in the world: Sunflowers. They are simple yet elegant. Simply elegant. Though it is ironic or rather coincidental, that the photograph of these lovelies is from the Telegraph, a British paper. (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/gardening/5540994/How-to-grow-sunflowers.html) I say this because I started off the school year doing a project which required me to use that newspaper. Ah, it's strange how everything is slightly connected, isn't it?

Well that ends this selfish post.
(:

Stick to your guns

     I learned a great lesson in not letting go of what you believe in. Remember that post in which I was complaining immensely about taking SOL tests? (This one.) Well I finally got what I wanted and deserved. I am exempt from all SOL tests because all my complaining made my counselor research the TAKS tests, and find that my scores were acceptable substitutes. There is nothing better than fighting for what you believe in, especially if you are right.
     The result of this hassle I have been though just to not take eleven tests, will be my influence to create an amendment to the U.S. Constitution that would allow for a national standardized test. Not state standardized but NATIONAL standardized. I know that no kid wants to take a dang test, ever; but I know that it is a necessary part of our education system. This nationwide standardized test, including military bases and territories, would make it easier fro children and young adults of military families, troubled households, and people who just move all the time. I would not negatively effect anyone, as there would be little to no change in procedure and administration of the new test as the old ones. This will have a positive effect on the national standard of learning, so we can have all the students at the same level. Sounds marvelous, doesn't it? Ah, but back to what I was saying: stick to what you are passionate about.
     People who do not have something to strive for everyday need to find something. Every person can make a difference if you allow your voice to be heard. Do not conform to the norm; be the black sheep in a flock of white. Find what it is that you love with all your being and run with it. And when you're right, complain until justice is served!
     The next thing I need to work on is the SAT but--as determined as I am--that should be no problem at all. Goodnight blogger world. Take care and remember to stick to your guns, they're the best you've got.

If my thoughts could ignite a flame

I'd be able to melt the polar ice caps.

     Do you remember who I am? Because I don't. I get as close as I can to touch anything, but there will always be particles between me and myself, between you and me, between eye and eyelid. I like the feel of the molecules between my finger tips and the keys of my netbook. Weird to say or rather, to type.
     I miss a lot. I know that I'm going to cry sixty-percent of the time while I'm in Texas. I'm am definitely going to cry when I get seen off by one of the most amazing people in the world.</3
     I'm in a disappearing mood. I want to leave everything. I want to start new. I want to sever all ties. I want to go to you and look straight in your face for a few seconds before looking at my feet and muttering "goodbye". The tears will hit the toes of my shoes and I'll look up at you one more time before walking away at a fast pace. There are very few things I want to take with me: Pawlie, Sophia (my vihuela), a small suitcase of clothes, and a large jacket. My hair is bleached blonde with some brown streaks from the roots, I'm wearing a denim button-up, large sunglasses, a sun hat with a sunflower on the right side, my sexy jeans (ha), brand new boots, and a matching waist belt. In my left hand I am carrying a business-like suitcase with my jacket folded over it and my right hand is holding Sophia. On my back is my little backpack with Pawlie, a few important documents, money, and such inside. I want to disappear....

     Yet, I don't know myself.

Eyelashes and magic 8-balls

     Twice, I have made the same wish on eyelashes and twice they have not left my finger. Once, I asked a question dealing with the wish to a magic 8-ball and it replied, "Signs point to yes." So in my mind it's still a no. I believe that even if I had three "yes" responses on an 8-ball, eyelash wishes are more powerful. I know it sounds silly but it's what I believe.
     I'm nearly an adult yet I still wish on eyelashes, dandelion puffs, and the first star in the sky at night. I ask for advice from 8-balls, horoscopes, and fortune cookies. I cry as the result of my thoughts, my dreams, and the small things people say. I'm nowhere near being grown-up.
     I mean look at me, I'm five feet tall and a senior in high school. (This is the part where you chuckle to yourself.)
     On a serious note, I enjoy the happiness. But who doesn't? Just to clarify though, I'm not talking about happiness. I speak of the happiness. The happiness and happiness are two completely different ideas. Happiness can be derived from anything, anything. Someone smiling at you can make you experience happiness. Finding a ten dollar bill on the ground can allow you to experience happiness. The happiness is what you feel between the people you're around, there's nothing more I can say to explain it.

The happiness is just the happiness.

The bat of an eyelash

     We'll look straight into each other's eyes and I'll think to myself, are you experiencing the same moment as me? Do you look in to my eyes as deeply as I do yours? Are you wondering what I'm thinking about? Are our eyes somehow communicating the things we cannot say? Are you just looking at me, thoughtlessly? Are you even looking at me? Is there something on my face? Are you thinking about someone else? Do I make you happy? Am I good enough for you? What is your opinion of me? Do you have an opinion of me? Why is my heart beating like this? Why do I want to cry? Why do I want to smile? Why do I want to break out into hysterical laughter? Does anything I do matter to you? Am I here solely for your benefit? Do you love me? Do you even like me? Do I remind you of someone else? Do I bother you? I'll smile to myself for a millionth of a second, I like your eyes. The questioning resumes. Will you replay this simple moment in your head later? Will you discard it like it never happened? When you go home do you even think about me? Does it make you mad if you do? Am I wrong? Are you wrong? Are we wrong? Then one of us blinks and the thoughts end, even though they lasted but a few seconds.
     It hardly matters. It's impossible to answer all my questions but I wish I could read your mind and answer them. I wish I could selectively read your mind over any distance. I'm curious.

Do I even matter?

Sugar-coated

     Yesterday, Kkarnage spoke to me for the first time in a few months. It made me happier than you can imagine. I was beginning to believe that all my love and care for her was in vain. I thought that she honestly didn't give two damns about me or what I wanted to tell her. All I really want is to keep her safe. I want to bring her home with me and teach her how to be right, even though I don't know how to be right myself. I want to take care of her and give her something that I can't give myself. If I could, I'd drop everything for her.
     If I could. I find myself saying that a lot and I suppose I can but it's not how I want to do anything. Dropping everything is so unrealistic, it's just a lie to make people feel secure. Yet, when it comes right down it, it's just about to damnedest thing one can tell another.

Would you take a bullet for me?
Honestly, probably not. I'm not brave enough to jump in front of a bullet, even if it was to save your life. I mean, put yourself in the same situation. You would want to but at the same time, we humans have such a  strong desire to live... If I was invincible, I'd take a bullet for you.

     Today was a sickly day. Yet I can't stand being useless when I'm sick, it's like a terrible curse. I cleaned the bathroom, the laundry, the stove, some of the interior of my car, my closet, my room, and I tried to clean the wall. I can't just sleep anymore, I don't know why. I really wish I could, I just wish I could. Weird though, it's only twenty 'til seven and I'm really fatigued. I might eat something but I know I want some tea... and some sleep.
     Dream with me again. I want to pretend someone is keeping me warm, although my room is as hot as the summer. Dream with me again, I don't want to be alone and delirious. Watch me sleep and keep me safe and warm. Please, dream with me.

"If you can't sleep I'll be there in your dreams. I'll be there in your dreams if you can't sleep at all..."

Take your own and I'll take mine

     Hypocrisy at it's best is found in the warm loving arms of those you hold the closest. I do nothing to make you make me do things on my own. I do a lot on my own, without your help. Without anyone's help, geez doesn't that make sense? Doing things on my own, by myself. Yes, it makes a whole lot of sense. If you ask me to do something that is not my duty to do, I'll do it. A lot of times, I'll do it without being asked. But don't tell me to take care of your business and mine. Don't make it my fault that you're not taking your own.

"Can you walk the dogs."
"Yes."
Both go outside.
"Why am I putting the plates on your car? It's your car; you should be doing this."
"These are your dogs."
They sure as hell aren't mine. Two Jack Russells are definitely not my dogs of choice. Dogs aren't really on my good side anymore.
You go in and ignore me.
I walked the dogs and put the plates on my car. You're welcome.

Collapse

     The world map to my right is falling to it's demise. It just dropped a little bit further and startled me. I suppose this is a sign. I'm sorry. It's long gone now.

i love you

dear passion you are like the missing piece of my pie. you make me smile over alot of of stupid shit. so right now i am watching chase hug you and it looks funny because its you. i love to laugh at you. its great. please take a seat  you said... ON MY DICK... that would be something chase would say but all he did was just stare at you. (:

hello  kitty

thats right  i just put a random picture in this blog 

well i love you passion 

hugs with no kisses

 

                                        love your jigglypuff,

                                              kasey smith

God makes wishes too

Last night:
     I've seen snow before, but I've never seen the actual action of snowing. I went outside and walked around as the flurries of snow fell from the sky. I smiled; I felt as though God was blowing a giant dandelion puff over the city. I wonder what he wished for, eternal life?

This morrow:
     What little snow remained on the ground from last night is now melting away, sadly. Sigh. It's suppose to snow again today. Hopefully it stays with me, well the ground really. So I thought, does this mean God's wish doesn't come true?

Before I perish...

I hope to accomplish a majority of these things.

(Not in any particular order)

1. Live past 2012
2. Participate in the CSS program
3. Join the Peace Corps*
4. Travel to every state in U.S.
5. Travel to every continent on Earth
6. Travel to every country in the world
7. Try a food whose name I cannot pronounce
8. Meet Michael Cera
9. See Kimya Dawson live
10. See She & Him live
11. Get Alesana to autograph something for Kasey
12. Write a great book
13. Keep this blog forever(:
14. Take up photography
15. Learn to draw the human form
16. Get multiple tattoos (with meaning)
17. Get a monroe
18. Get a belly button piercing
19. Learn to speak Spanish more fluently 
20. Spend at least a month in every Spanish-speaking country
21. Learn a third language
22. Learn something useful everyday
23. Invent something
24. Adopt-a-highway
25. Adopt a pet
26. Adopt a child
27. Register to vote
28. Vote in every [residential election
29. Participate in the community
30. Graduate high school
31. Go to college*
32. Complete college*
33. Get married (Once)
34. Have children
35. Be a good mom
36. Have a bilingual household
37. Inspire someone
38. Do a marvelous canvas painting
39. Donate a dishwasher
40. Cook nearly everyday
41. Build something
42. Personalize everything
43. Befriend a homosexual
44. Create a new food
45. Paint a mural
46. Purchase a famous painting
47. Own an exotic pet
48. Grow giant sunflowers
49. Start a business
50. Do a radio shout out
51. Meet my family in Puerto Rico
52. Visit my family in Chicago
53. Keep in touch with good friends
54. Reunite with people from my past
55. Forgive
56. Organize
57. Disorganize
58. Exercise
59. Run at least one marathon every year
60. Create a million dollar doodle
61. Travel by boat
62. Own a Volkswagen Camper
63. Own a moped
64. Be on television
65. Write a song
66. Compose music
67. Own multiple types of old technology
68. Make a fashion statement
69. Model (again)
70. Plant a tree
71. Beautify the world
72. Become strong enough to start a lawn mower
73. Discover something
74. Educate people
75. Eliminate (or reduce) the use of hand sanitizer
76. Own a zebra chair
77. Throw an amazing surprise party
78. Build a treehouse
79. Own a two story home
80. Have a girlfriend
81. Own a thoroughbred animal
82. Get wrinkles from excessive smiling
83. Write a better will
84. Periodically update that better will
85. Stop cussing
86. Stop buying notebooks I don't need
87. Write and illustrate a children's book
88. Make a stop-motion film
89. Fill a piggy bank
90. Understand calculus
91. Learn why watches never stay on time
92. Read more
93. Complete the Vampire Chronicles series
94. Expand my vocabulary
95. Sky dive
96. Snowboard
97. Ski
98. Water ski
99. Scuba dive
100. Understand a televised sport and enjoy watching it
101. Learn the inner-workings of cars
102. Learn to drive a stick-shift
103. Experience a fire
104. Survive a zombie apocalypse
105. Write a song about Thanksgiving
106. Learn to ballroom dance
107. Learn sign language
108. Graffiti something public
109. Own a dessert restaurant
110. Get a complete tan
111. Randomly punch someone who deserves it
112. Stand up for someone
113. Stand up for myself
114. Shave all my hair off
115. Look up the 12 original amendments
116. Learn how to hula hoop dance
117. Have a therapist
118. See the supernatural or non-human existences
119. Get a driver's license
120. Learn astral projection
121. Get 00 gauges
122. Read the entire Bible
123. Crowd surf
124. Try a veggie burger from Burger King
125. Be a vegetarian for more than a month
126. Become a volunteer firefighter
127. Work at Target
128. Join a branch of the military*
129. Become president of the United States
130. Go to a rave
131. Etch a family member's name from the Vietnam memorial
132. Take a trip to D.C. on my own
133. Surf
134. Add to the chewing gum wall in Seattle, Washington

* conditional wants

red : completed goal

Additional information:

     I plan to periodically add goals, remove them, cross out completed goals, and the like. Every time I accomplish a goal, I will blog about it that day with the title of each entry like this: "Goal #45235: Eat Cheese"

If you have any suggestions, I'd love to hear em! ENJOY!(:

"Since the emotion is no longer existent."

I told you I'd be back.
     I guess I was wrong. Ouch, that hurt a lot. Second time I'm crying today. Well at least this was more worth it, not just a lame test I didn't end up taking. I hate when you call me Passíon, you make me feel like a child. Like you're this great big person looking down on me. I can hear you saying it too, and it makes me grind my teeth. And when I tell you I hate it you never fail to bitterly mutter, "Well what am I supposed to call you?!?" But it was all a misunderstanding, I believe... I hope.
     One truly recent photograph.
     Quite upsetting but I'm okay now. I'm done crying, I think.
     Goodnight world and all its inhabitants!

P.S. Lately, I have been waking up to Free by Mike Mains & the Branches. Just had to note that.

Begin by falling and finish by getting back up

     Newton's Third Law of Motion says that I am going to have a terrible rest of the week or more. My past few post have been fantastic and full of excitement. But not today, not today.
     I woke up a bit late and thought nothing of it. Got ready for my day and actually ate breakfast, fabulous! I walked out to the bus stop as I munched on my peanutbutter and jelly sandwhich and drank milk from my dino juicy. The bus arrived and I made my way to my self-assigned seat. Just as I sat down, I remember that I was having a test in the morning and that I forgot all of my things on the coffee table in my room. Drat! Already a bad beginning.
     I looked over to Kasey and asked if Ms. Susan, our bus driver, would let me off the bus so I may get my supplies. She made a slanty face and said no which in turn, made me frown. This problem could have been solved much quicker and much easier if I have my cellular device on my person. Let me explain the situation with that.
     I am a seventeen year-old high school senior, my father--with whom I am living with for the first school year of my life--thinks that it is necessary for me to leave my cell phone at home. He uses this analogy: "It's like wearing a seat belt: the one time you forget to wear it, you could get into a fatal accident. Just like the one day you forget to turn the volume off on your phone, you can get it taken away for going off in class." And okay, I understand that but wouldn't that be my fault? I could deal with my phone being taken away if it was my fault in the first place. I wouldn't ask my father to get it back either because I think it is a just punishment for my forgetfulness or what have you, given the situation. Though, I digress.
     If I had my cell phone, I could have called my father as soon as I realized that I was utterly unprepared for the day, but I didn't. If I knew my father's cell phone number by memory, I could have called him from Kasey's phone or of the phone's of any number of people on that bus, but I didn't. So I did what any logical person could only assume to do, go to the office and wait.
     The ladies at the office were less than concerned with my dilemma and proceeded to discuss other students' issuses before my own (even though I was there first...) Upsetting. When one of the ladies finally had the time of day to speak to me, she ridiculed me on my reasons for leaving my supplies at home. "What's your name?" she inquired. "Passíon Leon, I mean Leeee-on First name spelt like passion." (Though it is pronounced Pa-shawn). She searched the system and couldn't find me, so her reaction was to turn to me and sneer, "your last name is Johnson, right?" I looked at her, puzzled, and repeated "Leee-on, it's Leee-on." She rolled her eyes and turned to face the computer screen. She pulled a pen out from the drawer to her left and took a sticky note from a draw on the right and began to write a phone number I did not recognize. "Is that the home telephone?" I asked, still muched suprised by the unfamiliarity of the number. "It's your father's work number." "Uhhh... I would really much rather have his cellular number, please." She looked at me weird and said, "It's in another area code, that would be long distance." I said nothing but requested the number again, I honestly did not see the issue. I left the office to go use the phone at the oddly placed front desk.
     After getting permission from yet another lady, I used the telephone and tried dialing my father's cell phone number. It didn't work. The phone would not allow me to enter all ten digits of the phone number. Oh, that's the issue with it being from a Missouri area code. Drat. I tried his work telephone and no one answered, as I assumed would be the case. I was more upset than before, how was I going to get this call placed? I didn't know where to go, so I quickly made my way to English class.
     I was hoping that I could explain my situation to my teacher, but wait! There was still a little hope left! I asked one of my fellow classmates if I could use thier cell phone, with the approval of the teacher of course, and one boy was generous enough to lend me his. I dialed my father's cell phone number and it went through! Yes, this might be the fix to my day!!!!
     "Are you home?" I asked, quite eagerly. "No." I started crying and we said our goodbyes. I returned the phone to it's owner and then plopped my head on my desk. The teacher came by and asked if I wanted to explain my situation. I was stressed for the test we were about to take, a test for which we could use notes (which, as I've said before, were on my coffee table). He was very understanding and allowed that I could make it up on a later date. I was glad to hear that but it was a short lived joy beause he handed me two yellow slips of paper that listed all the SOL tests I was required to take.
     Nine different tests. Nine test that are supposed to be taken throughout high school. Nine tests that I am really stressed about. To understand my level of stress I had toward these tests, let me give you some background.
     Since the fifth grade, I have done my schooling in San Antonio, Texas. The standarized testing that the state of Texas had, at the time I lived there, was called TAKS. I took and passed all my TAKS tests and I definally passed my Exit Level TAKS tests. (Which determines whether or not you graduate from high school.) Mind you, that the state of Virginia has a much higher standard of learning than Texas. Therefore, the TAKS tests apparently do not waver for the Virginia SOL tests. Complete and utter bull! I should not be required to do more testing just because I am a new student. I believe they should take my past TAKS testing into consideration. Virginia is definitely not Texas and I have learned from this expierence is that I will not move whilst my future children are in high school. I would not want ot put them through this bologna of a situation that I am in now. But once again, I digress.
     The SOL test I am most stressed about is one of Virginia and U.S. History, a class I have never taken in my life. I took Texas and U.S. History because, well, I WAS IN TEXAS! What is the point of making me take a test that I am doomed to fail. What do I know about Virginia? I know where it's located, I know that it's colder than Texas, and I know that the school system is a dozen times more complicated than in Texas. I am going to speak to my counsler about this abomination, hopefully tomorrow. But you see here, dear reader, this was only the first few hours of my day. I don't know if it gets better or whether it gets worse, but I have a strong feeling that this will not be my only blog entry today. See you later!

Awaiting life's bounty

     I'm excited. More excited than I have been for a while, more excited than when I had the epiphany to go to the Art Institute to become an interior designer. There so much that I do not want to wait for but want to at the same time... the suspense is killing me but I like it so much!
     Very early on the morning of December 22nd, I will be making my way (via plane) to my home in San Antonio, Texas. I will not return to Virginia Beach until January 3rd, the anniversary of the birth of my mother. I will see friends that I haven't seen since June, and boy I'm enthralled! Though it's not only winter vacation that I'm thrilled about.
     Summer! This is my final year of high school and it's amazing yet intimidating to see it come to an end so quickly... I have a vehicle, I'll have my summer vacation driving around the states, and then it's off to college in October. Dang. There's so much I want to do!

I don't have to look fantastic to take the
 world by storm, I'll just do it!

     I was looking into the Peace Corps as an assignment from my journalism class and it's pretty dang spiffy! I was thinking of trying the Cross Country Service (CCS) program first. There are some major differences between CCS and the Peace Corps, though the biggest being the length of time required to stay in a foreign country. For the Peace Corps, you are required to spend two years in another country and an additional three months for training prior to departure; versus CCS whose stays are from one to twelve weeks, so no more than three months. I think I would first try twelve weeks in the CCS program to make sure I had the dedication for the Peace Corps. These thoughts have motivated me to begin thinking about making a bucket list.
     Sure, I'm only seventeen, but I want to live life! I want to experience everything from climbing mountains to eating something whose name I cannot pronounce. I think in my next post I will put up my bucket list and I'll go back and cross through things as I complete them. I love this blog. Gee-whiz, I feel free!

A truer reflection

     So, as all can see, I have enhanced my blog's header. I chose these two images for a couple of reasons, but firstly, I must inform you of their whereabouts and the reason I chose them.
     The image on the left, of the little girl blowing a dandelion puff, was found at this web address: http://www.pbase.com/nickythurgar/image/87190232 (Taken by Nicky Thurgar) I am not to owner of that photograph therefore I should receive no credit. Well I chose this photo because it reminds myself of me, a much cuter version I must admit. Ha ha. It's simple, yet elegant, and no other photo of dandelion puffs could better capture that particular moment. (Seriously! Try googling dandelion puffs and tell me when you find a better photograph.)
     The photograph on the right was taken by my own right hand on March 1, 2010. It was a Monday as well as the one-year anniversary of the relationship between Joey and myself. Instead of going to school, and he work, we went to the zoo, dined at Wienerschnitzel, and went to that amazing book store that sells fancily bound books; but I digress. You cannot tell, because I have used greyscale on the image, that the bracelets on our wrist had blue x's and green lines. (Which maybe be why I chose this template, subliminally...) Moving on, I made these bracelets out of soda tabs and lanyard string, pretty simple to do and an easy way to make money, but not the point. Joey got the very, very, very first pop tab bracelet that I have ever made! It was kind of falling apart... but it was theeeee original.<3 The ring I was wearing is clear with a daisy painted on the inside, so it looked amazing on my finger. Sadly, that ring broke and lies somewhere in my things at Joey's house. The reason I chose this photo is for the simple fact that it was when I was completely happy with him, and it'll always be a part of me. But I feel good that I'm here now, in Virginia. "You started losing your identity..." I was told. I want to define myself and we're both young, after all "we have all the day in the world!"
     These are a few of the other photographs I was going to put on the right side of that adorable little girl:

I took the photos of the bird(s) January twenty-seventh, two-thousand and ten at a Sonic (the eatery) in San Antonio, Texas. I want to say it was downtown, but I'm not sure if that exact location would be considered to be downtown San Antonio. I believe this Sonic location was near the book place I mentioned earier. It was just a normal day out, Joey and I. Just something to get us out of the confines of our tiny house.(:

     The sticky note wall was a Christmas slash welcome home present. Guess who made it? Ha, you already knew, didn't you? Yes, Joey. I visited my dad for Christmas of 2009 and I got this upon my return to Texas. It must have taken a lot of time and apparently a lot of sticky notes! I don't remember if I cried when I saw it or not, but I feel like I did. If you can tell, this photo is two photographs combined into one. I did not chose this photo as my blog header because I didn't think that greyscale would do it justice so I didn't even give it a second thought. I could never put any shame to this artwork, it's too beautiful to disort.
     And although today is Turkey Day, I do not want to discuss it. I was rather quiet and kept to myself today. I think I will try to prefect the appearance of my blog by messing with the html. Adios!

A hard day's work... for most of us.

     Half day at school means one hour blocks, pretty close to what I'm used to. Mhm, Texas.<3 Well that really isn't today's discussion; it just kinda leads in to it chronologically. My seat on the bus was empty because the person who typically keeps the left side warm was on her way to the Bueso residence. At noon, Ligia arrived at my house, as planned, to begin our new "business" of raking people's yards! Yaaaaaayyyy.
     At twelve thirty, Ligia, Pablo, and myself started the treacherous journey to find a homeowner who was willing to have the three of us rake leaves from their yard, for the low price of ten dollars! After three or four initial rejections, we came across a man who was planning on raking his yard today anyway! What perfect timing we had and thus we commenced! When we nearly finished raking up the entire front yard, the man offered to pay an additional fifteen dollars if we would rake the backyard as well. Of course, being the eager youngsters we are, agreed with excitement. Twenty-five dollars is what this yard was worth so far, and boy were we happy! Once we started to get into the backyard, Kasey and Dennis (who I did not expect to see and who volunteered) came and started bagging leaves... slowly... Jared called me and joined in on the awesome raking action and also earned two dollars. Time passed and all of a sudden we were done. "Thank you guys so much," the lady said, "We were going to do this today anyway, but we completely under estimated the amount of work that there was to do! We're having guests over for Thanksgiving tomorrow and you have saved out lives." It made me smile to feel like I had done such a great service for that lovely couple. I had a few fail moments in that yard, but the funniest one was, "Wait! Dennis is still in the backyard!" And he was just a Kasey away... FAIL! The guy threw in another twenty dollars making our grand total a whooping forty-five dollars in just one yard!
     The next yard made everyone enthralled because the leaves were so big and easy to rake up! Who wouldn't be excited about that??? Ha ha ha. Well, the man took our offer of ten dollars to do the front and when he saw the great job we were doing, he offered an additional twenty five to do the back too. Monetary total: eighty big ones! Matt joined as a volunteer as we finished up the back yard. It was sad though because it seem that when the leaf blower stopped, so did everyone else... slowly the slacking and coldness began and the back yard ended up looking half-assed. Jared left halfway into this yard and Kasey, Ligia, and Dennis retired to Kasey's house because it was too cold. Fine. More money for me and Pablo, eh?
     Two more houses said no, two said come back another day, one said yes. He took our ten dollar offer and we began raking. That man had the largest leave covered front yard I have seen! It took along time to get it done but the three of us did it: Matt, Pablo, and myself. The man ended up paying twenty dollars. Not because he wanted to, but because he didn't have any tens. I guess we kind of lucked out on that part...
     Presently, I am exhausted. I want to roll over and sleep for years. I'm too tired to shower, just gonna get in something warm and knock the hell out. Oh and I said I love you first. Good night blogger world.

P.S. The pay was apportioned to the time each person worked and how well they did. So don't be all upset with your pay, you get what you deserve. Thank you volunteers! And somethings else... but I forgot! BYE!

Skyscrapers have faults too

     A few minutes ago, I wrote Kasey a little poem which she found really cute so I'll probably quote it in another entry, just not today. Anyhow, I think things are going pretty swell for the most part.
     I began writing a descriptive essay (minimum of 500 words), it begins "The room was still and as cold as winter, just the way he liked it. 'Bzzzt, bzzzt," whispered the air conditioning unit as our breaths brought in the room's only warmth. This little house of ours was laden with his favorite scent, the thick smell of dust. And as I sat at the high bar-style table, I watched him push up his superglue remedied glasses and sweep his freshly cut hair from his face with his pinky fingers." I'll post the whole story as I finish but until then, topic change!
     It was weird to watch them fight because, although I have heard of it, I had never witnessed it first hand. I don't really have any idea what the argument was about but I felt like, for just a moment, she and I were going through the same thing. I don't particularly like this person of whom I speak but I felt as though I could talk to multiple people about somethings... and she would be the only one to understand in the sense I imply it. So even with my sheer dislike of her, I feel somewhat compelled to become her friend and end the monster within. I think I'll write a note and see if anything happens from there, maybe I'm sticking my nose to far in... but it can't hurt to try to make a female friend, can it?
     Speaking of friends, it's ridiculous that I find that my friend ratio of boys to girls (in the Virginia area) is about 5:1. It's kind of strange but I do not know how to become friends with a girl by myself. I met Kasey because my father and I met Ligia because Kasey. I've met other girls through other friends, but none that I fit with right. Making a female companion is like cooking: if you don't put the right portions of ingredients, the end result will be horrible. No one wants to eat horrible food, except when the cook is nodding eagerly about their self-proclaimed "amazing dish". Though Kasey, Ligia, and I will begin the initial workings of our fall/winter business: LEAF RAKING!
     We've got it all planned out: leaf-blower, raker, and leaf bagger! BAM! Ten dollar per yard I believe and we'll alternate jobs. It's a great way for all of us to spend time together and earn some cash! (Let's just hope people want to pay us to rake their leaves!) Well it's time to shower and call it a night. Sleep well blogger world;<3

Lost in slumber

     I dreamt of having a giant timeline on my wall, of what I don't remember, but it was of quite some importance. These people and I rearranged the timeline countless times until it reached the point of near perfection, I suppose. A girl said to me, "Bad dreams come from your stuffed animals being upside down." That line really took me by surprise, I didn't think little things like that had that much impact. This is kind of silly, but I want to test that theory, ha ha ha! I'll report my results in another blog entry.
     Moving on, yesterday was quite a day. Well not really. I wanted to be alone, sometimes I get tired of always being surrounded by people. I took the dogs for a walk by myself and instead of the normal petty chatter I was used to, I looked around and really admired my surroundings. I watched a few leaves, carried by the wind, glide down from their tree and softly touch the ground. I noted to variety of leave colors that my Texas eyes were not used to seeing. And I'd close my eyes and take deep breaths and open them to reveal the vast beauty of this land called Virginia Beach. I put the dogs away and decided that I still wanted to be alone.
     I took some chalk and walked to the ugly tennis court by the park, my mission was to draw. Alana from the art institute told me that drawing was something that could be taught, so I tried my luck and I think it was a success. Just so you know, drawing in chalk is far from the easiest thing because it takes at lot of spit and a lot of rubbing that spit to erase anything. I think that the drawing accurately represents me (except I parted the hair the wrong way) and this is sort of my motivation to practice getting better at uhhh... drawing!
     Later on in the day, Kasey met up with me and eventually Den, Lee, Big L, Pablo, and Charmander. Mhm, a lot of people on my day alone. No big deal though. Just kept to myself most of the time, listening to my iPod. I think the end of the day was the best though...
     Laying on the fallen leaves, looking up at the stars. It was beautiful and cold and I believe it was only six-ish. I walked home and the day pretty much ended, I watched The Bounty Hunter with Heather and my dad, then went upstairs, played two games of free cell, then went to sleep. That's when my timeline dream began. Good morning.

An oasis in the desert

     Bittersweet is the perfect word, or as Señora Jones said "mal dulces" or bad candy. (She meant it in the way of bad but sweet).
     Today, my father and I took a tour of the Art Institute of Virginia Beach. I don't know how else to put it except that I feel as though it's a perfect fit for me. Though, nothing is set in stone until January. It feels completely new and breathtaking, like standing at the foot of a summit and looking up to see how tiny and insignificant you really are. And in the same token, it's as refreshing as the breath out of you mouth right after you have brushed your teeth. Not all factors are this interesting, unfortunately.
     You seem to love me when you're in a good mood and that upsets me. Some days I deserve the world and others I deserve nothing, some days I'm cute because I act like a kid and others I'm childish and need to grow up, some days I'm selfish and adorable and others I'm self-centered and stupid. I can't be everything but I am someone, and that person is simply Passíon.
     I'm tired of pleasing everyone, it's my time now. And I'm going to accomplish everything and anything to make me happy. I'd like you to be the hand holding mine, doing something you love... We'll see. We shall see.

Accomplishment

     For the first time in a long time, I feel like I'm doing something right and productive. I'm not sure of the outcome and all that jazz but it's exciting. I'm holding fast to this feeling because it seems... I don't know the word, uh... GREAT??? Ha, I'm not sure. I haven't been this excited about much in a while and I know I haven't been blogging so much recently. It's hard to find the time between studying, projects, and socializing; but I digress.
     I feel like I'm on top of the world and it feels so silly but I'm a cloud. I have a good thing going and it's so new. A newness I haven't felt, ever. I guess all I can do is keep doodling and smiling a stupid when people look at me funny. Holy BeJesus, it's great! I don't know how I can better convey the complete and utter felicity I feel streaming through my veins. I'm getting a vehicle soon and it just seems like all the pieces are falling so perfectly together! Well I don't have much more to say about anything except that religioustolerance.org is definitely worth checking out and phobialist.com is a fun little site to figure out what to call your quirky little fears. Well it's I'm done with this. I'll make sure to blog more often. Good night!

Sunflowers still wilt

     I am, for the time being, back to my cute self. You make me smile and cry all the same. I hope this will last, though I'm not sure if it will. It's already starting to fade and it's only just begun. You can plant the seeds to grow a sunflower but it won't grow without your patience, and mine.

Dreaming up nightmares

     It's strange. Everything felt like a dream to begin with just to turn sour in the end. You surprised me. I didn't know what to think. Things started to flow like corn syrup from a jar: smooth yet thick. One day. Just one day. And that corn syrup got all over the floor and made a huge sticky mess. A mess with purpose, though. But it seems everything is misinterpreted, as always.
     To my father, I am headed down the path of being seventeen and pregnant. He thinks that after I graduate or whatever, that I'm gonna get pregnant and do nothing with my life. I have no ambitions, but to be a mother, and I highly doubt I have the capabilities to do that. Not necessarily that I won't be a good mom but more like my body wouldn't be able to handle it. I think of that a lot, but that's for another day. I've been trying to tell my father that I don't want to go to college and that I don't want to join the military but "doing nothing" is not an option. He says I'm setting the bar too low and that I need to form some expectations for myself. I do have an expectation: I expect myself to graduate from high school, no GED or whatever, but a full on high school diploma. After that I don't know what I'm gonna do, I just know that I'm not stupid. I will do something when I'm ready; but right now, I'm not. I'm tired of everyone pressuring me to make something of myself when I there is nothing more I want to do than work at Target. I'm sorry that it's not enough for you, father. I'm sorry I'm not your perfect, educated son. I'm sorry I'm not who you want me to be. I'm just your fuck-up of a daughter.
     Besides being, no wait, I'm a fuck-up to pretty much everyone. Yep. Sorry world, I'm not a functional member of society. Maybe after I graduate I'll lose contact with the vast majority of the people that care, how does that sound? I'll end like Chris McCandless: dead somewhere in the middle of Alaska. Mhm, and I hope you think great of me then. I hope by then that I will have made you proud. All of you.
     Too bad I care too much to let myself die and lose contact with you, even if all I do is disappoint you. I care a lot. Too much for my own good. But on the bright side, I fixed the bracelet. I wish that when I go to sleep I will awaken from this nightmarish dream, and if I do, I'll remember to tell you to stay. Please stay, I'm more trouble than I'm ever worth. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry everyone.

Men and their vehicular pride

     I didn't blog yesterday and I don't remember how I felt so I'll probably shift between the two a lot in this entry. So I'll start with whatever comes to mind.
     My ears have been burning a lot lately, especially the right. I wonder who's doing all the talking. Oh, speaking of talking, I had a flashback moment because of what happened yesterday. Kasey, Matt, and I were walking past Food Lion (keep in mind that Matt has a huge rock in his hand, don't ask why). So we were minding our own business and Matt raises the rock to this guy's car who is driving past us; the guy looks like a typical prick, wanna-be surfer dude, and he gets out of his vehicle. "You got something to say?" Matt looks at him like 'whatever' and says no dude. The prick guy starts calling Matt names and thinks he's all cool by talking down on a kid in front of his girlfriend (who was really impressed). We kept walking and the guy took the time to loop around and talk more mierda. Lame guy with nothing better to do but talk crap to kids. -_-
    The flashback that the previous situation reminds me of is one day at dollar theatre with Chance and Andy. I think this was the day that we put the Black Panther CD on, top volume, and the first song began with a woman singing, "We will not back down... from RACISM!" The vehicle next to us was a African American person with their windows rolled down, classic. Ha ha ha. Moving on, we were close the theatre and Andy was kinda swerving for a reason I cannot remember. Well this guy in front of us got upset and when we turned into the theatre parking after us. We got out of Andy's car and started our way to the front of the building, and just then the guy pulls up next to us. "What the ****? You ****ing kids..." Blah blah blah. Andy was being real serious with him and I couldn't help but want to laugh. "Go what your damn movie, see what happens when you get out!" The three of us looked at Andy's car and I was near tears. The guy sped off and I said, "What is he gonna do? Give you a paint job?" Ha ha ha, oh well. Today, there isn't much more I want to say. Goodnight

Voltorb and Electrode, Self-Destructive Pokémon

     It was a great day, it really was. It wasn't school that made me explode, it was the events that followed getting off te bus...
     Apparently its wrong to get upset when some one is constantly hitting you. Oh wait, I mean "playing". I am soooo sorry that I don't find the humor in getting hit repeatedly with your beanie and hands. MY BAD. But I believe that I had every right to be mad. And you know what? I'm very happy at how easily you can drop me, when I do everything in my power to hold on. I care about you and our friendship, but if you can't even apologize, I think I'm wasting my time. The funny thing about me, though, is that I keep caring long after my logic says not to. So here I am. Waiting. I figured that I'm never enough. Well, we both know that. And like I said, I'm waiting. Hoping I'll be enough. Pretending I'm so goddamn great, so goddamn great.
     I cried and went to the garage after blowing up at you, I punched the walls, then I sat alone in the middle of the floor, giving myself time to attain composure. I was okay, for a while.
     You called me. You asked me-- no, you told me to go home. You said I have no emotion and that I don't care. That my heart in an envelope is not enough. I'm never enough for anyone and I want to do the impossible: make everyone happy. And you...
     You still make me happy. And all the arguing is futile and I'm glad that we always stray from it. It is very unlike us. It's not us at all.
     My grandma called me; the things she said made me smile. We spoke of greedy children after Christmas and love. She's the only one that has faith in me. Well, beside ourselves.
     On other things, I have a irreplaceable best friend. No one can top this friend of mine. I mean, sometimes she doesn't listen to me and other times she's really mean; but she's still my best friend and I love her to death. If you don't know who I'm talking about, I speak (well type) about Kasey. She's always there for me and I hope she knows that I'm always here (where ever I am) for her. I love her with all my heart and never in my life have I had a better best friend.<3
     There are other things swimming around in my head, I've been having a lot of flashbacks. Flashbacks are weird. It's a different expierence than what you would expect. It's mind-blowing actually. They were talking about Christmas presents that they were told not to open until the 25th (of December, obviously). It made me remember when I lived in Japan. Marky Chase handed me a box and said "Do not open this until Christmas day". I placed it under the tree and waited day by day, wondering what it held inside. Some days I'd hold it in my hand and imagine the contents. Other days I'd shake it, hoping to tell what it was by the sound. Christmas morning I woke up early and opened the tiny white box and pulled out a necklace whose charm appeared to be a marijuana plant (lol) with the wrong amout of leaves. It was sort of clover-like in a off green color, on a yellow-gold chain. I remember admiring it for a long time. I hope I can find it some day. But that isn't the only flashback I've been having, just the only one I'm going to share with you. Goodbye.

Daylight savings is humanity taking a loan from time

     Slow day. I spent the majority of last night on the phone, after being called sweetie by a girl. Not in a lesbian manner, but in the manner which is used to insult. I slept in and I think daylight savings had nothing to do with it.
     Speaking of daylight savings... It's a ridiculous event. Sure we gain an hour of sleep but in the long run, was that one hour worth losing one in spring? I don't think so. And it is lovely to go outside and it's light in the morning, isn't it? Yeah well I much rather have it lighter later in the day so I'm not afraid to stay outside at five o'clock. Daylight savings is this stupid idea that humanity can control time by asking it for a loan. The funny thing about loans is that you have to pay them back and, oddly enough, we go through this ridiculous process every year. But I digress.
     Today I spent a little time with Kasey before she went to her grandparents, and the rest of the time with Pablo. Pablo and I made art out of a canvas, paint, and trash bags. We named it "Unicorns" then spent quite some time identifying small objects within the whole. We came to my house and did extravagant math problems to figure out how much seconds are necessary in an hour for my wrist watch to gain one minute everyday. It was complex but interesting. Later, we played a game on my mini fridge where we took turns drawing small doodles to make a grand picture. Quite enthralling. I started drawing everyone I know in stick figure form but I'm far from finished. After Pablo left, Heather, my dad, and I headed to watch the Greenbay Packers play the Dallas Cowboys.
     I didn't really want to go but you know, what could I do? I wasn't too hungry when we got there so I ate a little here and there. I socialized a bit. I sat. I drank sweet tea. I nibbled on things here and there. I played with my iPhone for quite a while. I started falling asleep so it was decided that we return home. I had been trying to type this while I was over at the house of Packer's fans, but it just wasn't the same. I like the feel of my computer keys. It is time to call it a night though, I will see you tomorrow.

Almost tomorrow, yet today is never ending

     Sometimes it feels as though nothing goes right even when it's going swell. Today was uneventful. I mean, I did go out and do something... it just didn't feel like it. It felt like nothing was accomplished whatsoever. I woke up at five o'clock this morning and I have yet to sleep. I'm very tempted to take a fist to my face. Tempted. But I digress.
     This morning started off slowly. Thinking about whether I should go back to sleep or not, after all, I would not be leaving my house until 7:20. I read all I was required to know about taking the SAT test this morning. I had my two (mechanical) pencils, a White Pearl eraser, my TI-84 Plus calculator,  my SAT admission ticket, a fruit roll-up, and my wallet which contained the necessary photograph identification card. The fact that my pencils were mechanical is a very important factor because I had multiple warnings against using them.
     On the SAT admission ticket: "Leave the following prohibited items at home- you cannot use them while at the test center: mechanical pencil... etc". The test booklet and answer documents also warned me more than once, as did the test administrator and the writing which remained on the blackboard for the duration of about four hours. I refuse to write with regular everyday pencils: they smell repulsive, breakage means you have to take the time to sharpen them, and generally, the erasers are terrible. Well we shall soon find out if mechanical pencil really doesn't work on the SAT test. (I wonder if I am allowed to discuss this on the internet, we were specifically told not to use any type of media to discuss the test... Ah, I think I'm okay. I'm not discussing questions or answers or anything of that nature.)
     Back to the testing experience: Timed shtuff, you know. I'm antsy. I sit with my legs up in my seat because the feeling of my feet touching the ground is disturbing. I'm easily distracted. I don't believe I did so well but we shall see in the time to come. I finished testing at about one o'clock and then went to go deal with some cellular business concerning my phone plan.
     It's quite a story, the background of why I was at the at&t store, so I shall begin. I moved to Virginia to live with my father, whom I have never spent more than a vacation's time with. I was previously a resident of Texas, in the custody of my mother but it is difficult to say with whom I lived with, that story is for another day. Well back on track, my mother didn't want to pay for my phone bill anymore; for various reasonable reasons (ha, reasonable reasons) including me not living with her. (But of course!) Well my father had been putting this off for a while. "Next weekend," he'd say or "You didn't remind me..." Well today was finally the day. Right after SAT testing, I was inside a small at&t sales center. For a long while, my father and the man named Cody talked about how difficult it would be for my phone to get transferred to his account, then later to tell us that it was quite impossible if I wanted to keep my own number. Then we found out that my line was the primary line of my mother's account. How strange, ha ha ha. Well that went on. My phone is still under my mother's plan but my father plans to pay her the fifty dollars a month it costs to keep my phone line alive. Then it was chow time. Yummy.
     Schlotzsky's Deli. It wasn't my choice of an eatery but everyone else wanted it. I chose the Thai chicken pizza, for no particular reason, and it was enjoyable. The day dragged on because I had to preform daily tasks: shower, fix hair, walk dogs, etc. Boring. It wasn't until around 5 o'clock that something actually happened.
     Kasey and I asked Mister Greg for a lift to Pembroke Mall. We spent a good amount of time in Hot Topic searching for Christmas presents for our friends. Eventually we made our way to the movie theatre where we watched that Facebook movie "The social network". It was okay. I would not spend money to go see it in the theatre, which I did not. (I had passes) Anyhow, the best part of the movie was the whole forced cannibalism and chicken thing. Kasey missed the BEST part. Six out of thirteen Christmas presents have been purchased today. And after getting picked up by Misses Kasey's Mom, my day ended and I founded this. Oh, and ate a lot of Halloween candy. I will probably run it off tomorrow. Goodnight.