With the arrival of my Sophies, I thought back to the only pair of tennis shoes I would wear---my converse. The right one has a growing hole at the inside heel. The heels on both are so worn down that "ALL·STAR" is completely illegible and holes are forming at the bottom. The laces on the right shoes busted, so I tied them together. They smell so bad that wearing them for five minutes makes it seem like I've worn them for days. It was obvious that these shoes needed to be retired but they've been my favorite for so long, for so many reasons, that it's been near impossible to stop wearing them.
My shoes are laden with my past love and I can't help but feel a sinking of my heart as I remove them from my feet a final time. On the toe of the right shoe "=) You are my sunshine!" is written in his small handwriting. All around the sole is "Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine...." almost completely faded away. On the toe of the left shoe "I Love You!" is inscribed in fading silver sharpie. Around the sole the words are completely gone but they used to say, "Words can't describe the way you make me feel with every smile you throw my way." The left shoe also has a green checkerboard shoe lace, the other is on his right shoe. I purchased the shoe laces two Christmases ago and it was our "together, always, whenever" kind of deal.
We haven't talked in so long and I know that it's best for us if we continue our own paths of life, but it's always a sad reminiscent feeling looking back at these battle scars. Every item in my possession is like a little stab at what used to be and the old feelings emerge just enough to notice. It's like when you find a photograph of you and your old best friend; and it hits you that you don't even know where they are, let alone how they are doing. Your stomach churns a little, a few tears well up in your eyes, you sigh and continue with your life.
We've been through a lot in these past two years. No one could ever replace you two as I will always have an immense love for you in my heart; but right now we must part. I know it's hard and neither of us wants to, but we can't keep lying to ourselves about this. You're falling apart, quite literally, and I need something more stable. Don't take that the wrong way, you know I'll always love you from the the deepest parts of my soul. We are sole-mates, maybe it will will work out in time. But for now, this is "see you later." Adios, mis amores,<3
XOXO,
Passíon Leon(:
