I don't even know what to title this

     I gave myself sometime and I'm no longer angry at the female gender. I just feel like I'm staring at my reflection in a puddle, not enjoying what I see. I get frustrated with myself and stomp in the puddle, only to get myself all dirty and hate myself more. I don't really know what I'm doing, with anything. I work, I eat, I sleep, I visit Mankie... Rinse and repeat. That's my life in a nutshell, but things are so much more complicated than that.
     I have a lot of people on my mind and something almost always seems to go wrong when I'm happy. I'm beginning to feel like I've betrayed myself and become the "other girl" once more, but I was unaware this time around. I hope that's not the case but I feel like I fall second to... well everyone. I'm no one's girlfriend and I don't really feel like I'm anyone's friend here... Kasey's like the only person who feels the same way about me as I feel about her. It's not like it used to be though. Everything changes, regardless of whether we want it to or not.
     I guess I've just been fishing in a fish-less pond, it's no wonder that I've lost a few hooks and caught nothing. I guess I ought to find a better pond, huh? But I'm too stupid to leave, I'm too happy with my unhappiness... if that makes sense.

It's how I feel.