Sunday, January 16, 2011

When it rains, it pours

I am typing this from my cellular device because I am spending the night at Kasey's and these thoughts must be recorded before I lose them in sleep...
I sit there and watch the happiness flow between them like the energy from an outlet to one's phone charger. I feel the anger build up inside me because you know, but they don't know. As a unit, they don't know. Part two of your unit is either ignorant or stupid. Part two has no idea that you and I know what Part two doesn't know. Part two is engulfed in you and your deception. I've played these scenarios in my head, where I tell Part two everything Part two needs to know.

Scenario 1.) The civil approach
To tears with anger because I've had enough, I pull Part two to the side and say "Grow up. This is not going to be forever. I'm sorry but this is about your counterpart. Don't talk, just listen." This would be the most noble of all the scenarios I am going to proceed to go through, which makes it the most illogical to do. I'm not this brave.

Scenario 2.) The loud approach
I grab Part two by the roots of all evil. I yell and I scream, but all in honesty. Part two doesn't listen. Part two will never listen. Part two hardly knows of my existence or rather, hardly acknowledges my existence. I know that Part two knows I exist, afterall we have exchanged words on more than one occasion; but not much more. But anyhow, Part two chooses not to hear me and you call me a liar. You comfort Part two and scowl at me, for the time being. You tell me that you'll drop me but still nothing changes. Part two doesn't believe me and I'm not sure whether the rest of them believe me or not. I wonder if their opinions of me change after my outburst at Part two and your response... This would be the boldest way to ensure things are put in thier place; but even so, I don't think much would change except that Part two would now carry a tiny bit of doubt.

Scenario 3.) The violent approach
I get in Part two's face and preach the truth. "WHAT THE HELL IS HEAVEN?" I get called a bitch and many other names that you all may imagine. I accept it but it's not enough for Part two. My only option is defense. I will not lay a finger on Part two, but you cannot get away with screwing with Passíon. This would be the most wreckless scenarios and one of the least likely to happen.

Scenario 4.) The secret scenario
I would befriend Part two without your knowledge because I know you would frown upon it. I write notes to Part two, unsigned and in a different calligraphy. I give the notes to a person to give to a person to give to Part two. Part two is ordered to keep them from you, else Part two remain ignorant. Maybe Part two doesn't respond, scenario ends there. Maybe Part two responds for the hell of it or just because. Maybe Part two takes it seriously, and learns how to be aware of what is going on within and round the comfortable unit in which Part two resides. This scenario is highly unlikely due to the sheer fact that I don't know people who are good with Part two. And Part two would probably inform you of the first note, therefore ending all possibilities of success on my part.

Scenario 5.) The keep your mouth shut and figure this out on your own scenario
I continue to leave Part two out in the rain. Though instead of keeping you nice and dry under my umbrella, that you do not appreciate, I tell you to get an umbrella for your unit because I'm tired of you using mine. I tell you that sometimes I have to be a bitch to fix things for everyone, and apparently my umbrella wasn't enough. I tell you that you have a unit to take care of and that as much as you may say I mean to you, I will never be your unit. Yes I know I sound like an asshole putting you to out in the pouring rain, but your unit has been there all along. And Part two didn't even know it was raining... I'm going inside my house and putting my umbrella away. I will look at you from my window as your unit huddles together for warmth, and you scowl. This scenario is the most likely to happen. Maybe it wouldn't happen like this, but I would really like it to. I'm tired of you convincing me that you need me because it's not true. You just want my umbrella. My fucking umbrella.




It's strange how well it fits.