One of my favorite reasons for spending time with Eduardo is that he makes me think as if there were no box to think outside of, if that makes sense. I"m pretty good at analyzing the surface myself, but he makes me want to dig deeper.
For example, I had begun to question the government's authority to tell every American to wear seat-belts. Who are they to demand that we be safe or, quite literally, "pay the consequences"? Who are they to forcibly "protect" you and I? Because in that small motion, we are losing so much more. It all comes down to Benjamin Franklin's famous words, "They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."
Who really cares whether you wear your seat-belt or not? It should be one of those common sense things that your parents teach you, one of those things you either take to heart or discard completely; not something that is forced into action.
I say that it is unconstitutional of the government to require people to wear seat-belts. If cigarettes and alcohol are legal means of destroying yourself, why am I not allowed to choose whether I wear my seat-belt or not?
The answer is simple, money. Why waste money on something like educating people about safe operation of a motor vehicle, when we can just fine them so we have money to clean them up when they die? And if they get in a wreck and didn't wear their seat-belt, we can just fine them again! Government one, people zero!
What are we going to let them take next?
Also, this is interesting: http://www.thefreemanonline.org/featured/the-fraud-of-seat-belt-laws/
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Exclamation mark
Things have changed a lot. Again. As always. (Which is an oxymoron in itself since always means that something remains the same, yet I'm referring to changing. Funny.) I guess the universe had better things in place for Robert and I!
So do you remember that date I mentioned having in this post? Well yeah! I think you can put two and two together and see what I'm getting at. ^_^
This is my boyfriend.
He's not cooler than you,
which makes him cooler than you.
How cool, eh?
(:
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Living fog
It was very foggy out as I left ihop to go home, but I wasn't scared. I wasn't afraid that I couldn't see more than a few feet in front of me. I was actually amazed at the beauty of it.
The fog was life, right before my very eyes. Sometimes it would be so thick that I couldn't see an oncoming vehicle if I tried; just like the very life I'm living now. I can't see far into the future that isn't just me planning my next few actions or days.
Then the fog would clear, momentarily, and I could see the road that lies ahead. But only for a split second, because life doesn't want us to know what we're going to be doing in the long run. We'll get those occasional glimpses to motivate us to get there, but not much more than that.
The fog was life, right before my very eyes. Sometimes it would be so thick that I couldn't see an oncoming vehicle if I tried; just like the very life I'm living now. I can't see far into the future that isn't just me planning my next few actions or days.
Then the fog would clear, momentarily, and I could see the road that lies ahead. But only for a split second, because life doesn't want us to know what we're going to be doing in the long run. We'll get those occasional glimpses to motivate us to get there, but not much more than that.
"You'll get there when you get there," the fog whispers from above, "don't get too ahead of yourself or you'll miss what's right in front of you."
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Thoughts about thoughts
No, this isn't part two to that last post. There may never be a part two, but I guess we'll both find out in time. For now, these are my thoughts. Enjoy them, or don't.
My mother thinks that I'm a slut because she doesn't know two of my male friends that have been in the house, because I don't always come home at a decent hour, because she thinks I'm like her. It's no use for me to keep crying over her opinions of me, she's going to think whatever she wants regardless of the truth.
This happens when I think I've got things right. Someone, usually family, has to take a giant crap on everything I do and everything I aspire to do. I'm not only a slut to my mother, but a good-for-nothing mooch as well. Apparently because I'm working right now, I'm just going to do nothing for the rest of my life. It's annoying to be constantly put down even when I know that I have much more going on for me than she knows.
I'm just a guest in this house of hers, she says. That if I don't abide by her rules and regulations that I need to find another place of residence. That she'll call my father and make him take my vehicle away from me for bad behavior. That I am pretty much nothing but nobody while living in this house.
It's raining pretty bad outside and I want to take a walk; I'll have my Hello Kitty umbrella overhead and glasses on my face. I'll watch as the rain hits the concrete and think a thousand and one thoughts. I'll wish for Eduardo to be there with me, to listen to me as I ramble on and on about the nonsense that runs rampant in my mother's household. I'll close my eyes and sit criss-cross in the middle of the wet road, just wandering through the millions of files in the office called my brain...
My mother thinks that I'm a slut because she doesn't know two of my male friends that have been in the house, because I don't always come home at a decent hour, because she thinks I'm like her. It's no use for me to keep crying over her opinions of me, she's going to think whatever she wants regardless of the truth.
This happens when I think I've got things right. Someone, usually family, has to take a giant crap on everything I do and everything I aspire to do. I'm not only a slut to my mother, but a good-for-nothing mooch as well. Apparently because I'm working right now, I'm just going to do nothing for the rest of my life. It's annoying to be constantly put down even when I know that I have much more going on for me than she knows.
I'm just a guest in this house of hers, she says. That if I don't abide by her rules and regulations that I need to find another place of residence. That she'll call my father and make him take my vehicle away from me for bad behavior. That I am pretty much nothing but nobody while living in this house.
It's raining pretty bad outside and I want to take a walk; I'll have my Hello Kitty umbrella overhead and glasses on my face. I'll watch as the rain hits the concrete and think a thousand and one thoughts. I'll wish for Eduardo to be there with me, to listen to me as I ramble on and on about the nonsense that runs rampant in my mother's household. I'll close my eyes and sit criss-cross in the middle of the wet road, just wandering through the millions of files in the office called my brain...
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Mini-vacation and lingering thoughts
I've been back from my mini-vacation in Virginia for a couple of days now but a lot happened in the few days I was there. I got so see so many people that I miss and who had missed me back, I became the stereotypical male with the "not-really-diggin'-a-relationship" attitude... I don't know. It's all been so mind-blowing that I don't know where to begin but bear with me as I attempt to.
I guess the beginning is as good of a place to start as any and my Virginia trip started with packing the night before. I left a few things here by mistake, like Kaden and Kasey's mom's Christmas presents but eh, I'll mail them sometime. The next morning one of my best friends, Chance; my ex co-worker, Chris; and Chris's friend, Troy saw me off at the airport. It was very sweet and fun and all that jazz. Chris and I have been talking-ish so I gave him a kiss and told him, "not yet" when he implied asking me if I wanted to be his girlfriend. I went about my business and slept 90% of both of my flights. It. Was. EPIC.
When I got home, in Virginia, I hung out with my best friend in the whole wide world, Miss Kasey Smith. We spent a lot of time going through the boxes that held everything that used to make my room, my room. The boxes were terribly packed but Kasey and I managed to condense everything so I would be able to have them sent over to Texas. There was a very sad moment when I reread a letter that used to be the reason I woke up in the morning, it was from Robert. (And if know me or have been following my blog for a while, then you should know how much Robert means/meant to me.)
I tried hard not to cry when I read "When you're ready just say, 'Okay Robert. I'm yours.'" But of course I failed. Let me get off topic for just a few seconds so that the reason that sentence made me cry makes more sense.
I texted him, "Okay Robert. I'm yours." To which he replied, "...|:" I tried to sleep that night but couldn't. I needed to talk to him because it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair for him to almost drop me because I had a date and expect me to be accepting of his new found interest.
I called him and told him I needed to play magician again, that I needed to be away for a bit in order to be more accepting of him liking someone else. He understood and I felt better the next day. I guess it was just one of those things I needed to say aloud for it to flee from my mind. We're friends again and that's fine and dandy, but it's kind of what got me into the sterotypical male attitude mood that I'm in now; which I will address as it comes in sequence.
Day number two I went to school to have lunch with Kasey and her friends. I had a pretty nice conversation with the oh-so-hottttt Mr. Ferris. He ended up giving me his number and we planned on having lunch... but sadly that didn't turn out. *Sigh* I saw a lot of people that I've been missing while I was at school and I even managed to not see those who I didn't want to see. (WINNING!) I ended up going home after trying to get in touch with Zach and failing.
Zach had just come down to Virginia Beach from Suffolk to visit... me mostly. A while later we ended up hanging out and ending up driving around with a bunch of people I hadn't seen since July. It was not what I expected since I was gonna hang out with Zach, but it was fun nonetheless. After the car ride my good ol' pal Bryant or as I have referred to him in past posts, SDB, took Kasey and I to the mall.
On the way we talked of things such as the hottttttttness of Ferris, the memories associated with streets we passed, Trevor Demasco (because I saw him on the way to the mall and yelled, "HEY! THAT WAS TREVOR DEMASCO!"), and work-related relationships. The mall was fun even though it was just a mall, and SDB was a good sport about helping Kasey and I shop even though our main purpose for going to the mall was Chik-fil-a.
At Chik-fil-a there was a very funny cashier named Nick, who helped us. He forgot a lot of our stuff so I wrote him a note and left him my number. In the note, I told him that he forgot my toy and my french fries, but that it was okay because Kasey said, "he was distracted by your beauty." It was pretty cool and I even got to take a picture of him with on of my four disposable cameras.
Braynt took Kasey and I back home and he changed so he could go P.T. with the Marine recruiters and whatnot. After he left Kasey and I went to hang out with John, Jenay, and the rest of the badasses and John's house. (I'll have pictures when I get my camera developed, promise!)
Nick texted me later and we all ended up going to the oceanfront, one of my favorite places in the world. I got on Kasey's longboard and hurried to the building that Zach and I conquered instead of going to prom. I got there long before anyone else and I just stared in awe, just last June this building was nothing but bones. I got sad and attack-hugged Zach when he and the others arrived. I cried into his chest and said, "That's not our building anymore." "Awh," he replied, saddened, "If I had a million dollars I would have bought it and told them to stop construction." We stayed like that for a little bit longer, before returning to the harsh reality that our building was no longer our building and would never be our building in the same sense again.
I withdrew myself from his arms and wiped my tears away; the time to be sad was over and the fun was about to commence. We didn't do a lot but make some hot tea at 7/11 and loiter for a good thirty minutes before we got shooed off the premises. We took some more photos and enjoyed the company of each other until a little before midnight, seeing as most of us needed to be home by then. I said my adieus and made my way into slumber.
I guess the beginning is as good of a place to start as any and my Virginia trip started with packing the night before. I left a few things here by mistake, like Kaden and Kasey's mom's Christmas presents but eh, I'll mail them sometime. The next morning one of my best friends, Chance; my ex co-worker, Chris; and Chris's friend, Troy saw me off at the airport. It was very sweet and fun and all that jazz. Chris and I have been talking-ish so I gave him a kiss and told him, "not yet" when he implied asking me if I wanted to be his girlfriend. I went about my business and slept 90% of both of my flights. It. Was. EPIC.
When I got home, in Virginia, I hung out with my best friend in the whole wide world, Miss Kasey Smith. We spent a lot of time going through the boxes that held everything that used to make my room, my room. The boxes were terribly packed but Kasey and I managed to condense everything so I would be able to have them sent over to Texas. There was a very sad moment when I reread a letter that used to be the reason I woke up in the morning, it was from Robert. (And if know me or have been following my blog for a while, then you should know how much Robert means/meant to me.)
I tried hard not to cry when I read "When you're ready just say, 'Okay Robert. I'm yours.'" But of course I failed. Let me get off topic for just a few seconds so that the reason that sentence made me cry makes more sense.
Remember my last blog post about being forgotten? Well yeah, I typed that out literally a few hours before Robert told me that he had found interest in someone else. How... strange the mind works, eh? All that means is that there is no Robert and Passíon in the forseeable future "and that's okay." Now we return to your regularly scheduled blog!I read that knowing that he was thinking of someone else these days and not me; it broke my heart because I had invested so much in making us work, in waiting because I love him, in every single thought... and he kind of just left me there. Suitcase in hand, ready to move in, and when I open the door he's having a jolly good time without me. It hurt. A lot.
I texted him, "Okay Robert. I'm yours." To which he replied, "...|:" I tried to sleep that night but couldn't. I needed to talk to him because it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair for him to almost drop me because I had a date and expect me to be accepting of his new found interest.
I called him and told him I needed to play magician again, that I needed to be away for a bit in order to be more accepting of him liking someone else. He understood and I felt better the next day. I guess it was just one of those things I needed to say aloud for it to flee from my mind. We're friends again and that's fine and dandy, but it's kind of what got me into the sterotypical male attitude mood that I'm in now; which I will address as it comes in sequence.
Day number two I went to school to have lunch with Kasey and her friends. I had a pretty nice conversation with the oh-so-hottttt Mr. Ferris. He ended up giving me his number and we planned on having lunch... but sadly that didn't turn out. *Sigh* I saw a lot of people that I've been missing while I was at school and I even managed to not see those who I didn't want to see. (WINNING!) I ended up going home after trying to get in touch with Zach and failing.
Zach had just come down to Virginia Beach from Suffolk to visit... me mostly. A while later we ended up hanging out and ending up driving around with a bunch of people I hadn't seen since July. It was not what I expected since I was gonna hang out with Zach, but it was fun nonetheless. After the car ride my good ol' pal Bryant or as I have referred to him in past posts, SDB, took Kasey and I to the mall.
On the way we talked of things such as the hottttttttness of Ferris, the memories associated with streets we passed, Trevor Demasco (because I saw him on the way to the mall and yelled, "HEY! THAT WAS TREVOR DEMASCO!"), and work-related relationships. The mall was fun even though it was just a mall, and SDB was a good sport about helping Kasey and I shop even though our main purpose for going to the mall was Chik-fil-a.
At Chik-fil-a there was a very funny cashier named Nick, who helped us. He forgot a lot of our stuff so I wrote him a note and left him my number. In the note, I told him that he forgot my toy and my french fries, but that it was okay because Kasey said, "he was distracted by your beauty." It was pretty cool and I even got to take a picture of him with on of my four disposable cameras.
Braynt took Kasey and I back home and he changed so he could go P.T. with the Marine recruiters and whatnot. After he left Kasey and I went to hang out with John, Jenay, and the rest of the badasses and John's house. (I'll have pictures when I get my camera developed, promise!)
Nick texted me later and we all ended up going to the oceanfront, one of my favorite places in the world. I got on Kasey's longboard and hurried to the building that Zach and I conquered instead of going to prom. I got there long before anyone else and I just stared in awe, just last June this building was nothing but bones. I got sad and attack-hugged Zach when he and the others arrived. I cried into his chest and said, "That's not our building anymore." "Awh," he replied, saddened, "If I had a million dollars I would have bought it and told them to stop construction." We stayed like that for a little bit longer, before returning to the harsh reality that our building was no longer our building and would never be our building in the same sense again.
I withdrew myself from his arms and wiped my tears away; the time to be sad was over and the fun was about to commence. We didn't do a lot but make some hot tea at 7/11 and loiter for a good thirty minutes before we got shooed off the premises. We took some more photos and enjoyed the company of each other until a little before midnight, seeing as most of us needed to be home by then. I said my adieus and made my way into slumber.
...I'll continue this post mañana as I need a bit of slumber.
Chou;<3
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)